Judas, the Lost Disciple

With candles lit, table set, food and drink prepared, Jesus shared his last Passover meal with the Twelve on the night He was betrayed. Their prayers and psalms echoed from the Upper Room where, with unleavened bread, bitter herbs, and roasted lamb, they symbolically relived the Hebrew Exodus from Egypt and rekindled their hope for everlasting liberation from exile.

The mood turned very somber when Jesus predicted His imminent suffering and death, again. Their teacher it seemed had been increasingly talking like this ever since He entered Jerusalem to shouts of "Hosanna."

For the last several years they, like so many others, had witnessed Jesus’ miraculous power over disease, storms, hunger, and death. They heard Him preach about the good news that the Kingdom of God was close at hand. And they - "the Twelve" - had been given the special privilege of leading the way with Him.

And yet, reclining among them under the flickering lights and shadows, eating the same bread and drinking the same cup, was His betrayer. The disciples couldn’t fathom this, but Jesus knew that the prophecy must be fulfilled that night, and, dipping a morsel of bread in the cup, handed it to Judas, saying, "hurry and do what you’re going to do."

The name "Judas" derived from his tribe of Judah and "Is-cariot" identified his hometown. The land of Judah had witnessed multiple resistance movements even before the time of Jesus. The Temple of Jerusalem had been successfully liberated from the Greeks by a man named Judah (sometimes Judas) Maccabees in what became the Festival of Hanukkah. Another minor resistance against the Romans at the time of Jesus’ birth is mentioned in Acts 5:37, led by "Judas the Galilean."

Judas started as one of many followers of Jesus with nationalist expectations about the Messiah and the coming reign of God when Jesus chose him to be one of the Twelve. And it was these expectations that often led to misunderstanding and frustration, especially when Jesus began predicting His sufferings and death at the hands of the chief priests. These enigmatic statements did not fit the narrative.

The real turning point came at the home of Simon the Leper in Bethany. As treasurer for the meager monetary funds of Jesus and the Twelve, John tells us that Judas hid a weakness for silver. After Mary supposedly "wasted" her costly perfume on Jesus’ feet, Judas cried injustice on behalf of the poor. Jesus swiftly rebuked him in front of everyone and spoke again of His death and burial.

It was at this time that the Scriptures tell us Satan began to inhabit the disloyal heart of Judas, who stole away secretly to meet with the Jewish leaders and discuss terms of the betrayal.

Was silver all that was needed for Judas to betray Jesus? Thirty pieces wasn’t much of a bargain for blood money. Or were the coins merely token compensation for a decision that masked a much deeper internal struggle?

After all, Jesus kept going on about suffering and dying, while the opposition of Jewish religious leaders kept growing. It didn’t sound like Jesus was expecting any triumphant victory over Israel’s enemies.

Maybe He wasn’t the Messiah after all. Or maybe, just maybe, if Judas could force a confrontation with Jesus, he could help settle doubts once and for all.

The other disciples were clueless as to why Judas left their Passover meal so hastily that night, but a little while later, in the Garden of Gethsemane, they saw him approaching from Jerusalem’s eastern gate, now leading a band of soldiers and Jewish officials to betray their beloved Teacher with a kiss meant for friends.

Following Jesus’ trial and sentencing to death, Judas was stung with remorse. Whoever Jesus might be, He was an innocent man. The silver was a reminder of Judas’ fault, and he had to be rid of it. But the guilt remained, gnawing at his conscience. There was only one way, he thought, to silence the voice of accusation in his mind. Judas decided to become his own judge and condemned himself to death.

Unlike the story of Peter, whose repentance led to redemption, the story of Judas’ repentance ended in misery. After Acts 1:25, and the disciples chose another to replace him, the name of Judas disappears from the Bible - but not from history.

Judas was not alone in his expectations about the Messiah and the Kingdom of God. Even as great a man as John the Baptist, as he languished in Herod’s prison, had sent men to inquire, "are you really the One or should we wait for someone else?"

Jesus did usher in a new age of the Kingdom of God, but not in the way that everyone expected or wanted. It would not be immediate, it would not be by force, and it would not be just for Israel.

Truth and love would be the weapons of this Messiah, and humility and service would define nobility in this Kingdom. The Kingdom had arrived, but the full reward of following Jesus was still a long way off.

Even after Jesus’ resurrection and before His ascension, the Twelve asked Him again if the Kingdom would now be restored to Israel. If they managed to misunderstand the nature and timing of His Kingdom the whole time they were with Him, what about us?

What expectations did you have for your life when you first started following Christ? What expectations do you have now, and what happens when those expectations are frustrated? Are you tempted to walk away from Jesus in disappointment? To force the kingdom your own way? Even to put Jesus on the witness stand of your mind to be cross-examined - "are you really the Son of God?" Could this mean that you might also be seeking after a messiah and a kingdom to fit your expectations?

The Kingdom of God is not only future. It is present right now but in ways we might not expect or see. So "[t]rust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding" (Proverbs 3:5-6). Do not allow impatience or frustration from your expectations to cause you to sin – no matter how justified you might feel at the time. To the repentant, never despair of God’s mercy to save you, for "the sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise" (Psalm 51:17).

Dr. Michael Whiting serves as Assistant Professor of Christian History and Leadership and Director of Written Content at Dallas Baptist University.